Who's the Fairest of Them All?

Obviously, today being what it is, my first post today was quite the downer. So let's have some fun. In my wanderings through the internet this morning, I came across this article from the Wall Street Journal which was posted in September 8, the day the football season started talking about the relative attractiveness of NFL teams. It was actually pretty interesting, especially given the lack of actual photos (I decided to add a few).

The NFL's Best Looking Team
By: Reed Albergotti

Obligatory Green Bay pic - QB Aaron Rodgers

Trying to predict the outcome of the NFL season has always been one of the great fool's errands in sports. This year, however, it's just plain foolish. 

A summer labor squabble, which led to a vast reshuffling of personnel and a truncated off season, has knocked the whole league off its axis. Rookies who just got their playbooks are about to be ordered onto the field to execute plays.

So rather than trying to predict the season's outcome, why not focus on another sort of ranking? Since the NFL's opening game between Green Bay and New Orleans Thursday coincides perfectly with the start of Fashion Week here in New York, we've decided to explore a vaguely related question: Which NFL team is the handsomest?

At the Journal's request, researchers at Ursinus College in Pennsylvania analyzed the facial structure of a sampling of 320 NFL starters (five offensive and five defensive players from each team). They also threw in two of the most photographed personalities on any team, the owner and the head coach. 

To measure each subject's attractiveness, the researchers analyzed their photograph with a computer program that measures facial symmetry, or how closely the two halves of a person's face match up. Research suggests this is a reliable measure of how attractive a person is perceived to be. It also suggests that looks are a fair predictor of a person's career success. A 1994 study found that more-attractive "symmetrical" people are paid about 5% more than the average person while more homely "asymmetrical" people earn up to 10% less.

To be clear, we're not saying there's any proven connection between winning football teams and good looks. If anything, it may be an inverse relationship: Teams with particularly attractive players might be guilty of favoring people who are more presentable than talented. Jennifer VanGilder, a professor of business economics at Ursinus who oversaw the research, said the lure of hiring pretty faces is unconscious. "People are drawn to more symmetrical objects."

So who wins the NFL's beauty pageant?

The most attractive sample of players, with an average facial symmetry rating of 99.47, was one of the worst teams in the league: the Buffalo Bills. Their record last season was a woeful 4-12. The least attractive team was the Kansas City Chiefs, a group that won its division last season and made it to the playoffs. 

LaDanian Tomlinson - New York Jets Running Back

The striking thing about the research, though, isn't the difference in attractiveness between teams. It's the fact that the vast majority of NFL players rank 10% higher in facial symmetry than the average Joe. They also seem to be better looking than other athletes. VanGilder also measured the NBA's All-Star team and found it was less attractive than our sample of NFL players. 

Another surprising finding: NFL quarterbacks aren't the most attractive players. According to this sample, the most attractive position in the NFL is the kicker. The symmetry score for kickers beat the score for quarterbacks by .16%. 

The least attractive position of the ones we studied was wide receiver. But with a score of 97.04, these men were still vastly more attractive than average people (who score in the high 80s), VanGilder said.

Even NFL owners and head coaches are extremely good-looking. In fact, as a group, they are more attractive than our sampling of defensive ends and linebackers, safeties, cornerbacks, running backs and wide receivers. Facial symmetry does not change with age, which is why 59-year-old Buffalo Bills head coach Chan Gailey is more attractive than many players. "My wife will be shocked," said Mr. Gailey, through a team spokesman. 

All this may be good news for the NFL, which has embraced outlets like social media, which give players more of a public profile, and has seen its players make star turns on shows like HBO's "Hard Knocks" and ABC's "Dancing With the Stars." The league has also been reaching out to female fans for years. 

A sampling of some of the greatest NFL teams in history shows that the NFL is becoming more attractive. The famously undefeated 1972 Miami Dolphins, the 1975 Pittsburgh Steelers, 1985 Chicago Bears and 1989 San Francisco 49ers would all rank near the bottom compared to current NFL teams. If the 1992 Dallas Cowboys played today, they would only rank No. 24. 

Mark Sanchez - New York Jets Quarter Back

Facial symmetry is by no means a perfect gauge of attractiveness. Mark Sanchez, quarterback for the New York Jets, isn't the most symmetrical player in the NFL, but he seems to get the most magazine spreads. 

And in case you're wondering: New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady (98.52) is about .5% less attractive than his wife, the Brazilian supermodel Gisele Bundchen (98.99%).

Apparently, according to this article, my taste in football players tends to run counter to what is "attractive." I think I'm okay with that.